Thursday, August 8, 2013

Wedding Bell Horrors

My first blog post I wrote that my baby boy had left and gone to college. I wrote about going into his room (clean for the first time in his life, btw) and standing there feeling sad and so empty inside. This was the impetus for taking up bridge -  a silly game (I thought), a useless hobby (I thought) where I have met so many wonderful people and had so much great fun.

Well now, that baby is getting married. This time, however, I am filled with joy. I am thrilled to be getting a daughter. It's all good.

So why is it that every night I have nightmares about the upcoming event? Or should I say nightmares about missing the upcoming event. One night I was at a Wal-Mart and couldn't get the doors open to get out of the store and by the time I got to the church, the ceremony was over.

Another night I was getting dressed and I kept putting my earring in backwards so that the post thing was sticking out front and the jewel part was behind my ear. And there were freckles on my face drawn with an eyeliner pencil that I couldn't wash off.

Last night I dreamt I was dressed and ready to go, earrings were in place, I looked in the mirror and to my horror I had grown a full beard. I tried to cover it with Bobby Brown make-up and although it did tone it down a bit, hairs were still sticking out. It was getting late and we needed to go and I said to my husband "What am I going to do?" and he said, "Shave it! And hurry!"

Have any of you ladies ever tried to shave a full beard in a hurry? It ain't easy. I was going over these long hairs with an off-brand razor not making a dent in the beard but doing a good job slicing up my face. Blood dripped down my pretty mother-of-the-groom dress and it was getting later and later..... Suddenly my husband's alarm-clock-from-hell rang out and for the first time I was glad to hear it.  Thank God it was just a dream, I thought, drenched in sweat and luckily not blood (And to think I used to have nightmares about Two-over-One).

I'm told Gillette Pro Fusion is a good razor. I plan on keeping a package handy as the big day approaches.

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